Anticipation (Obviously)

an·tic·i·pate  (n-ts-pt)

v. an·tic·i·pat·ed, an·tic·i·pat·ing, an·tic·i·pates

v.tr.

1. To feel or realize beforehand; foresee

2. To look forward to, especially with pleasure; expect: 

3. To deal with beforehand

15 days 
and 3 months.  
This is about the amount of time I have left until I leave.


One of the worst things in life is anticipation.  


According to the dictionary definition, anticipating is feeling, realizing, and foreseeing beforehand.
Beforehand what?  Well, the event or moment which you expect to arrive sooner or later.  
I am anticipating something HUGE.  Monstrous.  Colossal !!!  
...you get it...
Leaving my house, my home (not the same meaning as house), my family, friends, school, teachers, community, town, state, country, continent !!


First thoughts on Spain:


- Nahhh, it will be alright! This is what I want! (not to be away from everybody) I need a change. Some cultural experience.


- Sometimes all I want is to be so different yet fit in at the same time! I will be an US American with a different family, culture, and language back home.  However, I will be learning the same stuff, speaking the same language (<~~ well, trying to at least). Walking the same streets and breathing the same air.


- All I am doing is jumping over the Pond to Europe for a year!  It will be a lifetime of experiences.  




___Well, it surely became a little more complicated than those previous thoughts.____  


Second thoughts on Spain:
- What about ACT & SAT ?
- What about graduations, confirmations, family, weddings, FUNERALS!? (God forbid)
- What about my family?  It will only be the three of them. (Well 4, if you include the dog)
- What about my friends? 
- My sister's first year of high school? How will she survive without me? <=== maggs :)
- How will I change?
- What about my host family, will they like me? Will I like them?
- Where will I be?  North, South, East, West?


Then the anticipation.  **Look at the 1st definition of the dictionary excerpt.** 
The feelings of excitement, of fear, happiness, sadness, adventure, importance, loneliness, all popped into my system at once.  
It's this strange feeling.  All of these emotions can be described in one word.  Anticipation.  


I have that meeting coming up on Saturday.  I just got Step 4 from AFS.  I only have 3 1/2 months before I leave it all behind for awhile.  


comn' people. let's get a move on.  I'm drowning in anticipation. 


-adios